December 2005, Issue 8

Funny You Ask

When life shows up...

One evening, a Cherokee elder told his grandson the story of how as a young man he had struggled to reach a decision that would affect everyone in the village. A great battle had gone on inside of him before he made his decision.

The battle, he explained, was between the 2 wolves that live inside of him. One wolf, he explained, is evil, and represents anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego. The other wolf inside is good, and represents joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith.

The grandson thought about what he had heard for a moment and then asked, “Which wolf won grandfather?” The old Cherokee simply replied, “The one that I chose to feed.”

“Life” does have a tendency to show up every now and again for all of us and even the best of plans get de-railed. When “life” shows up, how often do you end up feeding the wrong wolf? Feeding the wrong wolf inside of us weakens relationships and often has an impact that is exactly opposite from what our true intent is.

A good friend and colleague sent this to me a long time ago. It served as a friendly reminder to me then, as it does now. Here’s to a happy, healthy, and wealthy holiday season and New Year! May all the wolves you feed be the right ones!

-Michael

If you have any ideas or suggestions, drop us a line at info@building-blocks.net.

Mind Your Cell Phone Manners
By Michael Goldberg

Have you ever noticed how many people walking down busy city streets are on their cell phones? Everywhere we go, from banks to airports, elevators to shopping malls, conference rooms to restaurants, cell phone addicts are blurting out steady streams of shocking and confidential revelations. Who needs to know the personal and (and sometimes) creepy things we're now forced to overhear?

In the United States alone, over 190 million people used cell phones as of June 2005, compared with approximately 4.3 million in 1990, according to the Cellular Telecommunications & Internet Association. As I write this article in a café on a Sunday morning, 25 of the 40 customers are on their cell phones – and I received 3 calls.

Have comfort in knowing that we’ve all offended others when talking on our cell phones. Not to worry. Here are some tips and friendly reminders to help you mind your manners the next time you’re making or taking that cell phone call in public.

You don’t have to take every call
I’ve been accused of never (or rarely) answering my cell phone. There’s some truth to this. OK, a lot of truth to this. I’ll rarely stop a face to face conversation to answer my cell. And yes, I screen my calls – don’t judge me, you do it too! I feel if I miss a call or don’t pick up; it’s no big deal (I’m sorry if it was you). Besides, isn’t that what voicemail is for? Emergencies are always the exception, especially if the call is coming from an unlikely source or at an unusual time.

One on one (or small) meetings
These include business meetings in an office, conference room, over a meal, or a venti whatever. Answering your phone in the middle of a meeting is rude. It means the person on the phone is more important than the one you’re looking at. If you’re expecting an important call – client, prospect, boss, pregnant wife – let the person you’re meeting with know ahead of time while putting your cell phone on vibrate (sometimes called manner mode). Guaranteed those you meet will appreciate it. Also, watch as they follow your lead.

Group meetings
As a professional speaker, I’m always amazed how many times someone’s cell phone rings during the course of a workshop, seminar, or keynote speech (this is after the whole cell phone etiquette spiel). I remember seeing comedian Howie Mandel perform in a club years ago. A cell phone rang from an audience member and Howie quickly ran down the aisle and took the phone. He spoke to the caller while back on stage. Funny stuff! In a business meeting? Not so funny. In a recent workshop of about 15 people, someone in the group answered their cell and carried on a conversation in the meeting. I just stopped speaking as everyone looked over at the rude guy on the phone. After a few moments, I asked if he wanted us to step outside so he could have some privacy. OK, I’m no Howie Mandel but he got the point.

Public places and spaces
Trains, planes, buses, airports, malls, stores, banks, elevators, restaurants, and other confined areas. Keep it short, sweet, to the point, and quiet – especially within ten feet of someone else. Incidentally, I learned this one the hard way.

Walking down the street
Personally, I’m uncomfortable walking down the street, paying for groceries, or getting my change from the drive through window when speaking on the phone. It just seems rude – but hey, that’s me. How would it make you feel on the receiving end? Exceptions - calling to say you’ll be late, asking for directions, making a million dollar deal, or trying to make the trade deadline if you’re a GM of a professional sports team. Otherwise, is the call necessary? Yes, occasionally we’re on the phone for social reasons. While on the phone, how can we concentrate on crossing the street or being courteous to those we speak to “live and in person” all day every day? Answer – we can’t.

While driving
It’s a great use of time speaking on the phone while driving in the car (headset on) – multi-tasking, baby. Best if there are no passengers on-board – unless of course you’re getting directions. Clearly, this is not the safest way to travel (you’re 4 times as likely to get into an accident according to the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration). Be courteous, keep the conversation light and not overly involved, and pay attention to the road.

Off means off!
Respect the rules when asked by the staff (or notified by a sign) at a hospital, in a theater, or on an airplane to refrain from cell phone usage - or any electronic devices.

Emotional conversations
Good rule – never take a call in public where the subject matter may be sensitive. Better rule – never take a call when the subject matter may be sensitive and emotional. If you can, take the call outside or call them back from a more remote location.

Let’s be clear. Cell phones aren’t the issue, people are. As we get more and more wrapped up with our cell phones, iPods, PDA’s, GPS’s, and other wireless do-dads, the more we forget there are other people out there. It just comes down to having more common courtesy as technology allows us to do more things today that we couldn’t do yesterday. Work some of these practices into your day to day and you’ll make a great impression with clients, prospects, and all business (and personal) contacts. I have to run; I need to take this call!

Michael Goldberg is a speaker, seminar leader, author, and the President of Building Blocks Consulting. He helps organizations attract more business and retain their employees. He also helps those looking for a job to find one. Michael speaks at conferences and associations, runs sales meetings, and delivers dynamic programs on networking, leadership, public speaking, communication, customer service, and career search. He is currently writing a book on networking with a working title he’d rather not name. For more information, feel free to visit www.building-blocks.net.

“ I have had dreams and nightmares.
I overcame the nightmares because of my dreams.”
-Dr. Jonas Salk

The Closing Question
By Ken Levine

If I’ve heard it once, I’ve heard it at least 100 times, "We need to get better at closing the sale.” I would suggest that maybe we need to get better at opening the sale. We need to be better at finding the real problem our client is dealing with and developing relationships. We need to determine if we can HELP our prospective client. We need to slow down and not be in such a hurry to close the deal.

Please imagine yourself as a decision maker. You agree to meet with a sales person who has been chasing you for several months. After a 10-minute discussion with the sales person, he/she starts with their closing techniques. ABC…Always Be Closing!!! The questions asked by the sales person are designed to have your head bobbing up and down like a Johnny Damon bobble doll in the back window of your car.

Your head is spinning and you are beating on yourself mentally for subjecting yourself to this torture. You are coming up with all kinds of reasons not to buy whatever it is that is being sold. The sales person persists and you are getting annoyed.

Trying to politely get out of this mess, you ask, "How much money are we talking about?" No matter what he/she says, you have already decided, it will be too much! The sales person is persistent though. All of a sudden, it’s the “Better Act Now” close (act now or the price goes up tomorrow) followed by the infamous “Referral” close (look at all of these testimonials about the great stuff we do). Finally, as you try to make your escape, it’s the “Last Ditch Effort” close (we'll drop our price/fee by 25%). Ouch!!

When you focus only on closing the deal, you attempt to close and you attempt to close and you attempt to close. At the same time, you tick off your prospective customers. The inability to close is a direct result of our inability to find the real problem that the client is experiencing.

The best salespeople don't employ any slick closing moves or techniques. They focus on understanding their customer's business and helping them achieve their goals and objectives. Instead of talking about their product or service, they ask a ton of questions. They keep their focus on their prospect's business challenges and the gaps that need to be closed to help their client achieve their objectives.

The next time you are in front of a new prospective client, and you completely understand their business, the problems they are experiencing and the financial impact of the problems, ask the following questions with lots of tonality “Do you want help?” Do you think I can help you? (At this point the answer better be yes) and finally “What would you like me to do now?” Bingo!!! Your client’s answer to this question should be “what do we do next?” or “what’s our next step?” Done, closed, and your off to the bank.

 
Building Blocks to Success is a newsletter published by Building Blocks Consulting. Feel free to visit our website at www.building-blocks.net.

If you do not wish to receive our newsletter, click here to unsubscribe.